Late Post & Apology

Hi everyone. I'm terribly sorry about not getting a review up for Wednesday. I was busy over at a friend's house, and helping another friend move. I don't really have much right now, but I figured these Chuck Norris jokes might be a good substitute (Emphasis on the might). Enjoy:

When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he doesn’t push himself up...he pushes the earth down.

There are no steroids in baseball. Only players Chuck Norris has breathed on.

Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.

Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger by yelling “Bang!”

Chuck Norris doesn’t churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes a picture of himself...crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes. EVER!

In fine print on the last page of The Guinness Book of World Records, it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.

When the boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming “Law & Order” are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. EVER!

Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice.

Jesus Christ only rose from the dead after God asked Chuck Norris for permission.

Chuck Norris' hand is the only one that can beat a royal flush.

Chuck? Norris doesn’t wear a condom, because there is no protection from Chuck Norris.

We all know Jesus could walk on water, but did you know the Chuck Norris can swim through land?

Chuck Norris doesnt watch porn, porn is watching Chuck Norris.

Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris walks on Jesus.

Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn. He stares at it and dares the grass to grow.

Chuck Norris finished the song that never ends.

Chuck Norris found a dead deer by the side of the road. He touched it, brought it back to life, roundhouse kicked it, and killed it again. Proving that the good Chuck giveth and the good Chuck taketh away.

Chuck Norris doesn’t swim in the ocean. The ocean moves out of the way for Chuck Norris.

See you all tomorrow, when I'll more than likely have a proper review up for you. Until then, stay Otaku!